Babysitting the Koopalings
by Gosky3
Summary: Bowser suddenly drops off the Koopalings and Mario, Luigi, Peach and Daisy are forced to babysit them. Can they handle them? Or will everyone go insane?
1. Sandwiches

In case you haven't guessed, I don't own any Mario characters or Nintendo…unfortunately…

This is my first Fanfic so I hope you enjoy it.

* * *

**7:00 A.M.**

It was peaceful in the Mushroom Kingdom, as it always was when Bowser wasn't attacking. Luigi was outside, watering the fire and ice flowers outside of the Mario Bros.' house when suddenly, a water balloon splashed on top of him, doing all the watering for him.

"Aah!" screamed Luigi. He looked up to find two koopas snickering on top of the roof. It was no one other than two of the koopalings, Lemmy and Larry. Luigi screamed again, this time running into the house. "M-M-Mario!"

He gasped and found Roy and Morton fighting each other in the living room. Luigi yelled once more, just as Mario came running into the room, still in his undershirt and underwear . "It's an attack! _Run for your life!_" Mario screamed.

The two scrambled out of the door and ran down the pathway. They only made it a few yards away before they bumped into Bowser Jr. "Where are you guys going?" he asked.

"Away from here!" said Mario.

"I thought you were babysitting us."

"Babysit—?" Mario's cell phone rang. He picked up the call. "Hello?"

"_Hey, Mario,_" said Bowser. "_I forgot to tell you that the koopalings were acting up today and I needed some time alone. They're yours for the next 24 hours…bye._" Bowser hung up.

"That son of a _goomba_!"

"Mario, I'm hungry."

"Go make yourself a sandwich."

"Well I don't know how, usually the other koopa troopas do it for me!"

Mario groaned. "I guess if I let myself get annoyed by just _this_, this'll be the only one of Bowser's devious plans that kills me." He reluctantly guided Bowser Jr. to the kitchen and began preparing him a sandwich. He spread the mustard on the bottom bread, and Junior moaned. "What?"

"I like the mustard on top." Mario sighed and put the bread aside to be placed on top later. He put another piece out and put mayonnaise on it. He put a slice of ham on it. Junior grunted. "I like turkey."

"What's wrong with ham?"

"I don't like it."

"Have you ever tried it?"

"No, that's why I don't like it, _duh!_" Mario rolled his eyes and took the slice of ham off. Just as he was going for the fridge, Junior whined again. "But now the ham's ruined the bread!" Mario's eye twitched, and he banged his head against the refrigerator door.

"This is going to take a while."

* * *

"Now remember, one leaf of lettuce, three slices of tomato, _then_ four slices of pickle, _then_ a slice of the spicy pepper!"

"When did you mention spicy peppers? I don't _have_ any spicy peppers!"

"There can't be a sandwich without spicy peppers!"

Mario topped the sandwich off with bread and gave it to Bowser Jr. "There!"

"What about the spicy pepper—"

"_Screw the spicy pepper!_" screamed Mario. His eye twitched again.

Bowser Jr. looked at his sandwich suspiciously, but then shrugged, accepting the sandwich. Before he could take a bite, Roy came in, snatched the sandwich, and threw it on the ground. "Sandwich! More like a dirt-wich!" laughed Roy as he ran out of the room. Bowser Jr. looked up at Mario.

"Can you make me another sandwich?"

Mario's eye twitched once more. "No."

"Bu—"

"_NO!_"


	2. Luigi's Mansion

**8:00 A.M.**

Luigi cowardly walked through the upstairs hallway. He had pillows tied to his back and front, pads wrapped around each leg, and a bucket helmet, along with a trash can lid shield. He shook the entire way as he slowly and silently made his way through the halls, cringing each time the floorboard squeaked. He felt the house really _was_ under attack by the koopalings. He quietly hummed the Luigi's Mansion theme to himself to calm himself down.

"You look like an idiot," said Roy.

Luigi screamed and turned around in fright. "Get away you demon koopa!" he shrieked.

"There's nothing to do in this dump! What do you do for entertainment around here?"

"Uh…w-watch TV? Most of the time we're either rescuing Peach, in Toad Town, or at Peach's castle."

"What about video games?"

"I have a GameCube."

"Do you have Super Smash Bros. Melee?!"

"No, but I have an even _better_ game!"

Roy's face lit up. "What? What? What is it?!"

* * *

Roy frowned and grunted. " 'Luigi's Mansion'?"

"Starring the one and only Luigi! I still remember that day when Nintendo hired me to star in my _own_ game! That wonderful day, I was—"

"This game sucks."

Luigi's wide smile turned into a frown. His eyebrows lowered. "_What?_"

"Shoving Mario into outer space worked, putting him on an island with fat piantas and Bowser Jr. worked, heck, putting him in a hotel with _you _worked better than this!"

Luigi growled. "_Hotel Mario sucked balls! Super Mario Sunshine sucked, Super Mario Galaxy sucked, every Mario game sucks! Luigi's Mansion and Mario is Missing are the ONLY games that are good in the franchise!_"

"Whoa, do you have an inferiority complex or somethin'?"

"_NO I DO NOT!_" Luigi shoved the disc into the GameCube, and the game started. He pushed Roy onto the bed and handed him a GameCube controller. "Play the game!"

"No!"

"_PLAY THE GAME!_"

Roy yelped and pressed the A button, beginning a new game of Luigi's Mansion.

The door swung open. "Hey, Luigi, can I borrow—" began Lemmy. Luigi gave Lemmy a death stare that almost gave him a heart attack. "_Agh!_" Lemmy slammed the door shut.


	3. A Prank With Consequences

**8:30 A.M.**

Lemmy ran down the steps screaming. Finally, he ran into Mario, whose eye was twitching as though he were having a stroke or spasm. He turned to Lemmy. "_What!_" yelled Mario.

"Your brother's acting weird!" he yelled.

"Was someone playing the GameCube?"

"Roy was."

"Your father's going to be one koopaling short when he comes to get you."

Lemmy looked at Mario in shock. "Uh…anyways, do you have any glue?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Larry and I wanted to play a prank on Bowser Jr."

Mario raised his eyebrows, and his twitching stopped. Then, his eyebrows lowered and an evil smile that Bowser probably wasn't evil enough to make appeared on his face as he thought of revenge. "I'm in."

Lemmy's eyes widened. "Oh, ok, then, you can help."

* * *

"Hey, Junior!" said Mario, holding a bottle of glue behind himself.

Junior was sitting on the couch along with Morton and Iggy. "Yeah?" he asked.

"Isn't your shell kind of tight? I think you need a moisturizer."

"Uh…"

"_You're shell's tight_, come here." Junior shrugged and walked up to Mario. "Turn around." He followed Mario's orders and turned around. Morton and Iggy giggled as they watched Mario pour down as much glue as he could fit in Junior's shell. "Alright."

"What was that all about?"

"Hey, Junior!" yelled Larry, coming from the stairwell. "Think fast!" He threw an expensive-looking vase at Bowser Jr. Mario jumped out of the way as Junior crouched into his shell, dodging the vase. _SMASH!_ the vase smashed up against the wall.

"Wh-why did you use _that?_" screamed Mario.

"Ha! Missed, Larry!" said Junior. He tried to get out of his shell. "H-hey, why is this moisturizing stuff so sticky? And why can't I get out of my shell?"

"It's fast-drying glue, moron!" yelled Lemmy. He ran up from behind, from the kitchen, and kicked Junior's shell. Bowser Jr. was left to spin helplessly across the room and against the wall. Lemmy jumped out of the way as Junior spun into the kitchen and flew through the kitchen and all around the house as though it were a pinball machine. All the koopalings in the room started cracking up, but Mario was on his knees, devastated by the shards of the expensive vase.

"This cost a thousand coins! A _thousand coins!_" he yelled, tears dropping from his eyes.

"And this prank is worth a million!" laughed Iggy.

"_Aaah!_" screamed Junior as he continued bouncing around the house. "_I'll get you guys!_"

Wendy came from upstairs. "Hey, short, fat, and tacky, where's the makeup around here?" she asked. "Mario? _Mario!_"

Wendy kept crying Mario's name as Ludwig came up from the basement. "Can you people keep it _down_? I'm trying to concentrate on my music! I keep missing the correct measures and—" Ludwig kept complaining.

Mario's eye started twitching again as he grew frustrated of all the noise. His face glowed red and he balled up his hands into fists. "_I can't take it!_ I need help!" He ran to the phone and dialed the first number he thought of.


	4. Locked Out

**9:30 A.M.**

The doorbell rang. If Mario hadn't been listening for it, he would have never have heard it amongst all the noise in the house. He ran to the door and opened it. Princess Peach and Princess Daisy were standing at the door. "You said it was an emergency, Mario?" said Peach. She looked behind him and gasped. "My word!"

"Isn't it a mess? That rotten koopa dumped them here and—" began Mario.

"Why are you treating Bowser Jr. so poorly! You should all be _ashamed_ of yourselves!" said Peach, walking into the room. All the noise stopped, along with everyone else besides Junior. Peach ran up to the spinning shell and grabbed it just before it passed by. "Junior? Are you ok?"

"I'm stuck," whined Junior in an innocent, baby-like voice.

"Who did this to you?" asked Peach.

"Larry, Lemmy…and mean ol' Mario. He's been mean to me all day." Peach gasped and turned to Mario with an angry face.

"Well, I mean—" Mario claimed.

"And he yelled at me when I asked for a sandwich…"

Peach put down Junior and stormed up to Mario. "You crazy son of a goomba!"

"I'm not related to a goomba, I swear!"

She grabbed Mario by his shirt sleeves "_How could you harm an innocent child like that!_"

"H-he's a koopaling!"

"_Does it matter? He's a CHILD!_" She threw Mario out the door.

Daisy moved out of the way and watched Mario fall down the stairwell outside. She looked down at Mario with a disgusting look. Mario looked up at her. "Daisy, don't—" She slammed the door shut. He sighed and tried the door—locked. "C'mon! Peach, Daisy! Seriously? It's my house! _Luigi?_" he yelled, banging on the door. "…Can you at least let me put some clothes on?"

* * *

"I'll get into this house one way or another," said Mario, holding his mailbox in hand, several yards from the door. He readied himself, and then charged for the door, screaming. The mailbox smashed through the door, while Mario's face slammed up against the door.

"Mail's here!" shouted Daisy.

Behind the door, Peach walked up to the door, opened the mailbox, and pulled out the mail. "Bills…bills…oooh, a monthly check for saving the Mushroom Kingdom! I'm sure Mario doesn't need this," she said.

"Peach, no!" said Mario in a nasal tone (From his nose being smashed up against the door). The sound of paper being ripped could be heard from outside. Mario cried from both the physical pain of his nose and the emotional pain of his check being ripped.

"Freeze!" shouted someone from behind Mario. He was pulled off the door and thrown against the ground. A toad police officer was holding a gun at his nose. "Attempting to break and enter, huh, buddy?"

"Is it a crime to break and enter into your own house?"

"Oh, so you're posing as Mario now?'

"_Yes!_ Can't you _recognize me?_"

The toad tilted his head. "Hmm…I remembered Mario's nose a bit less deformed and less bloody…"

Mario groaned.


	5. Chaos Erupts

**12:00 P.M.**

Daisy and Peach were sitting on the couch, watching TV with a few of the koopalings as they had been from the past 2 and a half hours. "I don't know what Mario was going on about, this babysitting stuff practically takes care of itself," she said.

"I guess it's kind of like motherly instinct," mentioned Peach.

"_Peach!_ I'm hungry!" cried Bowser Jr. from the kitchen "I wanna sandwich!"

"Hmph. Now to go make a sandwich for Junior, unlike Mario, who just yells at the children."

Peach got up and went into the kitchen.

**1:00 P.M.**

"_What do you mean I have to put the bread on at a certain angle?!_" screamed Peach, in the kitchen.

"So that the mustard doesn't get on the lettuce. You were putting it on wrong."

"_Why don't you do it?_"

"I don't know how!"

"_Just put the bread on!_"

"What about the spicy peppers?"

"There _aren't_ any spicy peppers!"

"But—"

"_Screw the spicy peppers!_ Just eat the sandwich!"

"You still didn't put the bread on the sandwich—"

"_Eat the sandwich!_"

Peach stormed out of the kitchen with a red, frustrated face. She then saw the scene in the living room. "What the…?"

Morton, Lemmy and Larry were fighting each other; an argument had sparked between Ludwig and Wendy because both of them claimed the other one was being too loud; and sounds of explosions were coming from the basement, where Iggy was experimenting with chemicals.

Just before Peach thought things couldn't get any worse, a crash came from upstairs. "This game is rank! I'm out of here!" yelled Roy. He came running down the steps and out of the house.

"_PLAY THE GAME!_" screamed Luigi. He came down the stairs carrying a GameCube controller, and chased after Roy.

Daisy was on the couch, in the middle of it all, looking as though she had gone mad from all the noise and trouble: Her hair was frizzy, her eye was twitching, and she was rocking back and forth while hugging a pillow. She looked like she was getting crazier and more annoyed by the second. Suddenly, she screamed into the air, "_SHUT UUUUP!_"

The sound of her voice echoed through the house, and outside, up into the air, where it could be heard in the outskirts of Toad Town. She panted for a few moments until she caught her breath. "Isn't there anything you can do _besides cause CHAOS?!_"

**1:30 P.M.**

"Junior, got any 4's?" asked Lemmy.

Bowser Jr. groaned and handed over two 4's to Lemmy. Ludwig turned to Wendy. "Do you have any sixes?"

Wendy glanced at her cards, and then looked back. "Go fish."

"Liar!" said Morton, who was looking over her shoulder. "You have three sixes!"

"Hey! Cheater!" whined Wendy. Morton and Wendy bickered for a few moments.

"_HEY!_" yelled Daisy. The koopalings are stiffened. "Wendy, give up your sixes."

Wendy rolled her eyes and threw the cards at Ludwig. "There're your stupid cards!"

Peach looked out the window to see Luigi still chasing Roy around the house. "_PLAY LUIGI'S MANSION! PLAY THE GAME!_" cried Luigi, still furious. Roy continued screaming as he ran around the house. "Other than that, I can say that we have everything covered," said Peach. "How long do you think they'll behave?" whispered Peach.

"Until I faint from hypertension," responded Daisy.


	6. One Phone Call

**1:30 P.M.**

"I'm not sure, man," said a guard. "He does look a lot like Mario, besides the scarred and bruised nose."

"But he's not wearing the Mario get-up, he's in his undies," said the other guard.

"You've got me there."

"_For crying out loud, I'm Mario!_" yelled Mario. "Don't I get a phone call?"

The guard shrugged. "I guess so, that's what happens in the movies. Whadda ya think, Frank?"

The other guard nodded. "He might as well. Nobody can figure out who this guy is, he needs to call somebody who knows him."

Mario groaned. "_Everybody knows me!_"

"I don't."

Mario facepalmed as one of the guards opened the doors. The other one walked him to a phone on the wall. "You get _one_ phone call."

"I've watched enough police movies to figure that out, _Frank_," Mario replied flippantly. As the guards went to check on the other prisoners, Mario thought to himself: _Who do I call? Luigi's gone nuts over his game, Peach hates me, Daisy is on Peach's side…_ He groaned when he thought of the only person he could call. He dialed the number, and the phone rang.

* * *

Bowser was in the middle of playing golf. He studied the wind, the terrain, and readied his swing—he was going to make a hole in one. Just as he began to swing, the Super Mario Bros. Castle Theme ringtone played on Bowser's cell phone. He was thrown off focus, and he completely missed the ball and fell flat on his stomach from the power of his swing.

He groaned and picked up his phone. "Hello?" he asked.

"_Hey, Bowser, what's up…man?_" answered Mario awkwardly.

"Wha—Mario? What are you calling _me_ for? I was in the middle of playing golf!"

"_Golf? Why on earth would you play—never mind. I just called to…uh…ask you a favor._"

"I'm not picking up the kids yet!"

"_No, I…just…uh…can you bail me out of jail?_"

"Jail? What're you doing in _jail_?"

"_I was arrested trying to break into my own house._" Bowser snickered. "_Stop laughing! I'm sure you have enough coins to bail me out!_"

"Uh…_sure_. But why should I help you?"

"_Because…uh…remember all the good times we had on the N64? You know, we had parties, we rode go-karts, played golf and tennis, had a fighting match—_"

"You didn't invite me to Super Smash Brothers!"

"_Oh, you get the point!_"

"Fine, I'll get you out of jail."

"_Thank you!_"

"Don't think this means anything! We're still arch-enemies!"

"_Yeah, yeah._"


	7. Jail Break

**Midnight**

Mario looked up and saw his house from down the road. He smiled. "I'm home! I'm home!" he yelled as he ran up the road. But as he drew closer, he saw that the house was on fire. He ran in a panicky fashion to the house. The front door was hanging open, and he could see that inside Peach was trapped underneath a part of the ceiling that had collapsed.

"Mario!" she yelled.

"I'm coming, Peach!" Mario dashed to get inside, but before he could Morton and Roy appeared out of nowhere, blocking his way. "Get out of my way!" he yelled.

"Mario!" yelled a voice. He turned around to see Wendy and Ludwig arguing. "Ludwig is being too loud!"

"No, you're being too loud!" shouted Ludwig.

Mario slowly backed away from the chaos, until he bumped into Lemmy and Larry, who were fighting each other. He fell onto his back, and scooted away from the two. Suddenly, an explosion came from the house. He turned and saw Iggy emerge from the house mixing two chemicals together. Mario jumped back onto his feet and tried to run, but he tripped and fell back down. He stood up once again, but before he could run, someone tapped on his shoulder. He turned around and saw Bowser Jr., holding a plate. "Can you make me a sandwich?"

* * *

"_AAAH!_" Mario screamed. He woke up to see that he was still in his jail cell, far away from his home. He gasped a sigh of relief. "Maybe I should just stay here. Jail isn't that bad. I mean, they feed you _and_ give you your own room for free." He looked around. "I get a bed, a sink, and a nice, shiny toilet! Toilets cost 500 coins now in the Mushroom Kingdom! I mean, I'm living the life, here!"

All of a sudden, a strange thumping sound came from the brick wall. The sound of grunting could be heard. Mario gulped and stood up, backing up against the cell door. The bricks in the wall started to push forward—something was breaking in. "G-g-guards?" whined Mario, with a quiver in his voice. A brick finally fell, and an eyeball peaked through the hole it left. "_Aaah!_ _GUARDS! GUARDS!_"

An entire portion of the wall caved in, and a large hulk dressed in black fell into the cell. Mario continued screaming and turned to pound up against the cell door. "_HELP! GUARDS! GUARDS!_" The hulk grabbed him from behind. He shrieked underneath its big hands, trying to yell for help.

"Shut up! It's me, Bowser!" whispered Bowser.

Mario stopped yelling, and Bowser let him go. Mario turned back to Bowser. "What the _heck_ are you _doing?_ You're _breaking me out of jail?_"

"Isn't that what you wanted?"

"No, I wanted you to _bail_ me out!"

"I don't have any money!"

"But I thought you said—but this is a _felony!_ We could _both_ end up being locked in here for _years!_"

Sirens from outside sounded. Guards on the inside started running towards Mario's cell. "Too late now, come on!" Bowser picked up Mario and the two escaped the cell.

* * *

Bowser threw Mario into the Koopa Clown Car. Bowser hopped inside himself, and then looked around inside. "What are you doing?" yelled Mario.

"I can't find my keys!"

"Well, hurry up! I can hear the guards coming!" Bowser turned to see a silver key at least ten yards away. "What are you looking at that key for?" Bowser turned to Mario and smiled awkwardly. "Are you _kidding_ me?" groaned Mario.

Mario sighed and jumped out of the car. He sprinted as fast as he could and grabbed the keys, just as the spotlights spotted the Koopa Car and the guards started rushing towards them:

"Get back here!"

"You're both in big trouble!"

"Stop in the name of Princess Toadstool!"

Mario ran back to into the car and handed Bowser the keys. Bowser panicked and repeatedly missed as he tried to fit the keys in the ignition. The guards started to close in on them, getting too close for Mario's comfort. Mario finally grabbed Bowser's hand and aimed it so that the key fit in the ignition. Bowser started the car and the two flew off, leaving the guards behind.

Mario and Bowser both took sighs of relief. "Hey, I just realized, the guards know who you are. Won't they arrest you again?" asked Bowser.

"No," gasped Mario. "Because those idiots still probably don't know who I am."


	8. A Happy-ish Ending

**6:55 A.M.**

Mario woke up on a large, soft, comfortable bed. He cuddled it as he thought, _the angels must have brought this bed down for me from heaven._

"What are you doing? Get off!" yelled Bowser. Mario opened his eyes to see that he was on top of Bowser's stomach. He jumped off of his stomach and out of the Koopa Clown Car in disgust. Bowser got out of the car himself.

"What time is it?" asked Mario.

"Around 6:50. We got here four hours ago but I was too lazy and tired to wake you up, so I just slept along with you—and then apparently you used my stomach as a bed."

Mario looked up the road to see that his house was up the hill. He immediately sprinted up to the front door, and then tried the doorknob. The knob broke off. All of a sudden, the entire door fell into the house. Inside, Peach and Daisy were sleeping on the couch, in the midst of complete disaster: The TV screen was smashed, pillows were shredded, there were holes in the walls, vases were broken, books were ripped apart, and all sorts of random items were lying around—and even those were damaged.

Mario was left jaw-dropped as he stared at all the destruction. Bowser walked up behind Mario and was left jaw-dropped as well. "Oh…my…god…" said Bowser. He stepped inside. "I—I can't believe it."

"Neither can I."

"I mean, it's a miracle the house is still standing! Usually there'd be nothing left but a pile of wood and broken pieces! I must be a really great father!"

"Wha—they _destroyed_ my house!"

Bowser turned around. "I've tried every babysitter in kingdom, and each one of them were left homeless after they babysat the kids! You're lucky! Now, where are the kids? Did you kill them? Oh, that'd be the best if you—"

"They're in the basement," moaned Peach. "I ran down to the store and bought a large cage and stuffed them inside so they couldn't do anymore harm." She groaned. "Can—can you just kidnap me now?"

Bowser sighed, disappointed. "Oh. Well, I guess the cage is good enough." Bowser then went downstairs.

Mario ran to Peach. "Peach! Speak to me! Are you ok?"

Peach got on her knees. "I'm sorry I locked you out of the house for yelling at them. If I had had the chance, I _would_ have _killed_ those sons of a goomba!" she yelled. She held her head and moaned.

Bowser came back upstairs, holding a cage that all the koopalings were uncomfortably crammed inside. "Oh, do you have a headache?" asked Bowser. "That happens after you spend a prolonged period of time dealing with them. Don't think about them or the pain comes back."

All of the koopalings were whining. "Morton, get your butt out of my face!" yelled Wendy.

"I can't because Ludwig is crushing me up against Roy's spiky shell! _Ow!_" said Morton.

"I'm sorry I was born with spikes, like we _all_ were!" whined Roy.

"All of you just shut up!" shouted Ludwig.

"I'm still hungry…" moaned Bowser Jr.

Bowser walked out of the house with the cage in hand. He turned around at the front door. "You guys are great with the kids! Maybe I'll come around next week and—"

Daisy ran up to the door. Her face was red, her eyes were red, her dress was torn, her hair was a mess, and she looked like a wild animal. "_If you EVER make us babysit those DEMON kids of yours, I will PERSONALLY take your life with my BARE HANDS!_" she screamed the top of her lungs, her voice echoing throughout the entire kingdom.

Bowser was left shocked, his heart beating so loud you could hear it from several feet away. "Uh…bye." Bowser ran down the hill as fast as he could. He jumped in the Koopa Car along with the cage. He started the copter up and flew away, taking the koopalings with him. Daisy picked up the door and slammed it back into the doorway as a way of slamming it shut. She then collapsed at the front door.

"Uh…should I get help?" asked Mario.

"No, she—she's just exhausted," said Peach.

"Hey, where's Luigi?"

Luigi came down from upstairs, holding a GameCube controller. "What happened here?"

"You don't remember _anything_ from yesterday?"

"All I remember is something about Luigi's Mansion…"

Mario sighed. He found the remote next to his foot. He picked it up from off the ground, sat down next to Peach, and turned on the TV. Luigi picked up Daisy and joined the two. They all sat and watched the TV through the broken glass as the house creaked and pieces of the ceiling crashed and fell around them. "It's not working," sighed Mario.

"No, it's not," agreed Luigi.


End file.
